Welcome to our 2nd installment of Let’s Talk, our very own advice column. Kiera McNally is here on the line answering to all your needs. Thank you to everyone who wrote in!
I’m in college and I have this thing in my head saying “no new friends” but I also feel like I might be missing out on experiences if I keep telling myself that. I just don’t know how to be myself around some people, and the people are all kind of… snide in this area. I just wish I could initiate friendship, but I want to focus on myself and the current friends I have now as well. I feel kind of left out, but I think it’s helping me focus on more important things. what do you think? thanks!!
First of all “no new friends”? Wtf? No shit you’re going to miss out on new experiences and potentially meaningful life long friendships if you purposefully stay at home and “focus on yourself”. That being said, I am probably by myself about 87% of the time, and I’ve really learned to appreciate that time alone. I think the real issue is, that it has to be one or the other for you. I’m sure not everyone is “snide” and your friends will probably still be your friends if you make more, and there’s a lot to learn about yourself through new experiences. It may be a cliche, but the world is not black and white, just keep walking and enjoy the rainbow. :)
Hi Editorial Mag! This one is for Kiera. So I have this huuuge crush on a boy and I’m slowly trying to make it know to him that I think he’s a mega babe but I don’t know if he gets it. I want to go on a date but I don’t know how to get to that from being friendly acquaintances. I get nervous when talking to him but only because he is really funny, cute, and intelligent. How do I tell him how i feeel?.. Help <3
Dear Help, hey! you’re a mega babe! Just go ask that boy out! be honest and tell him you he makes you a little bit nervous, how cute is that? go squash that crush …
Why is love so damn complicated?? What is love? Sometimes I find myself thinking about it and wondering if it even exists, I mean, why is love the one thing that everybody seems to be looking for and can’t leave without :/?
Sorry but I can’t really answer your question, but maybe the fact that love is so complicated makes it worth it. Especially when you find the one you wanna figure it out with.
majasstic said: hello Kiki, I am a huge fan and absolutely admire you so much! I have a really bad friend that I can’t seem to shake, I was wondering what I could do to escape the negativity?? thank you & much love
Thanks for the love! Sorry you can’t shake that negativity, you seem like a very positive person. Sometimes being positive and receptive can make people victims of what i like to call “pyschic vampires” ( people that suck, heh ). It’s hard to be a good friend to someone that doesn’t make you feel good. Draining your blood and life force might make you half dead as well. My advice to you is to try and focus things that make you feel alive, like other friends and hobbies. And maybe carry around garlic and crucifixes just in case?
How do I find someone to luv
Can’t help you. I’ve been trying to find someone to go see the Steve Jobs movie with me for like a month. I could go alone, but it would probably be more fun with two. So I’ll just keep trying and asking and I’m sure I’ll find someone eventually. Hopefully you’ll do the same.
This question is for Kiera! This year, at college, I live in a suite with a few other girls but one of them is consistently rude to me, and only me. I have tried talking to her privately but she has some sort of bone to pick with me. She is really rude and makes fun of me behind my back. Talking to her has not worked but I have to live with her. How do I stop caring about how she feels about me
Dear college girl,
That sucks, you seem great to me! But you can’t please everyone. i say just keep being nice and you’re rubber and she’s glue and everything she says bounces of you and sticks to her :/….but really, keep living and and maybe eventually you guys will make some sort of new sticky relationship.
Hi Kiera! Do you have any tips on how to be more confident? I am not a self deprecating type of gal but I do have days where I feel like poop. How can I not feel like poop and often?
~Fake it till you make it~ And take confidence in the fact that everyone feels this way ( most ) of the time. Enjoy the shit show! heh
Hello Kiera! I have always wanted to visit Canada so I figured i’d ask an actual Canadian on some advice on places to visit! What do I have to see when I visit Canada? xx
Canada is a huge country with a lot to offer. i guess it depends on what you’re looking for? If its nature, i’d recommend Jasper national park. there’s crazy mountains and animals everywhere. If its city shopping I’d recommend kensington market in toronto, tons of vintage and parties. But if it’s a cheap burger in my fav Montreal diner i’d recommend Nouveau Systeme in Montreal. You may even spy Claire working on The Editorial Mag, dining on a $2 burger herself.
My boyfriend has been in this local band for like five years now and they just recently got an offer to tour opening for this larger band. I guess they will be gone for about two months playing shows across the states. I’m worried that shady things will go down while he is on the road, away from me for that long.. Any advice on how to remain calm and SANE (lol) while he is away?
Dear calm and insane,
Yes, the band will be partying and meeting all sorts of new people with all sorts of “offers” and things to say… but i guarantee that the majority of the tour will be spent in a tour van with headphones on, smelling farts,and staring out the window thinking about how much they miss their sweetheart (living it up!) at home. Calm down and realize that the first ingredient of love is trust. Sometimes adding a little bit of spice and space is nice too. Be happy they’re doing well and enjoy dinner! And if it doesn’t taste good, make something else.
I’m going to graduate in a month and I am so freaked out, I have no idea what to do with myself. I love to write and thats what I want to pursue but my parents are convinced that it won’t take me anywhere (which has not helped my self esteem much either). What do you suggest I do, and do you have any tips for me regarding creating a writing career?
Dear Mr./Ms Write,
As I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to realize that parents are correct about 99% of the time. But you have the remaining 1% to do what you want with. As long as you can give 100% into it.
Also, maybe you can try and convince of all the successful writers making it in the world now and all the careers available ( write it in a letter!). You know what you want to do and that’s right.
Kiki, I think I’m falling in love with my best guy friend, but has feelings for another girl. I don’t really know what to do ?????
Dear my best guy friend,
I’m sorry, my heart goes out to you…but you know, why do love this guy that can’t see how special you are? Why do you want to be a part of this club that doesn’t invite you to be a member? There are a lot of clubs! But ya, that sucks. Maybe let the bird fly free and maybe it will fly back to you and maybe you’ll realize you never wanted to be apart of that bird club anyways?
My best guy friend stopped talking to me all of a sudden. We would hang out all of the time and talk about everything but now, whenever I text him he responds bluntly, without trying to keep up the conversation. What should I do about it?
Dear my best guy friend,
Hhmmmmm……you could just call and ask right? Maybe he’s busy with work? Maybe there was a tragedy in his family ?( heaven forbid ) Maybe he’s in love with you? ( Not so bad! ) Maybe he’s just a flake? i know I’m a flake, but I’ll always be there if you need help (advice column).
never–say–die said: Hi! I am seeking some advice. I have recently decided to leave a toxic “best”-friendship after about 4 years. Its just time for me to move past it. And reflecting on my life, I realize that none of the people I surround myself share common interests with me. The things I’m most passionate about (music I love, making art) are just silly things to them. So I’m wondering how I can find people to connect with. Any words of wisdom? Thank u. Hope to hear back xoxo
Connect with? hmmm….instagram, tinder, facebook…..jk. I think you are on the right path, you know what you like and you know what you want. The rest just follows, if you keep following your heart. Appreciate everything you have around you and keep your head up, To quote my fav show Friday Night Lights “clear eyes, full hearts, can’t lose”.
KIKI! I really like this guy but I am way to shy to tell him I like him! HELPPP What do I do???!!??? Also you are the sweetest bean in town and I love you dearly :-) <3 hopeless girl from portland maine <3
Dear sweet hopeless maine bean,
Thankyou!! I love you! Now, just get over being so shy and be real and tell this guy you love him!! Or just see if maybe you guys can hang out sometime and take a deep breath and casually drop clues that maybe you’d like to spend more time with him…like in a romantic way. You don’t have anything to lose but a fantasy.
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